New Discoveries

Eve has discovered her tongue and it is so funny to watch her,

she had it sticking out all day!

Another discovery was the Safari Park.

Yesterday we went to the safari park. It is by far the best animal/zoo experience EVER. Just like a Safari, the animals are all around you and you are just driving through them. Some people get out of their cars and even feed the animals. They have rivers that keep the dangerous animals from coming over and eating you but it is very very life like and raw. It was so fun.

We got to hold a tiger. It was so cool. I was shaking.

Then they let us hold the white tiger.

Today we were at the US consulate all day working on the finalization of everything and an oath taking ceremony. No pictures, cameras weren't allowed!!

Sabbath at Guangzhou

After church - Look at her cute smile

We went to church yesterday. It was quite a large branch, about 50 people, including several youth which surprised me. It made me wonder how hard it would be to live in America and then have your parents pick up and take you to China. I asked one of the members how the youth handle it and he said "actually they start to get a little bit entitled because they are like rock-stars here. Everyone wants to be around them and then in their homes they have maids, cooks and drivers so they have a harder time going back to the U.S and being normal kids. I thought that was funny.

In front of the Church (it was a hotel like building) the meeting was on the 7th floor

We then had a yummy lunch at a italian restaurant that a member suggested.....it was amazing, we were served an appetizer of caesar salad, main course of scallop/tomato risotto and them a creme brule desert all for $8.00.

We then came back near the hotel, went for a walk around the river and then had an 80 min foot massage (Eve just sat in my arms) Oh it was so incredible. My idea of a perfect Sabbath in China.

During our sunday foot massage!

Eve is doing amazing. Every day she gets stronger, more outgoing, and more alert and connected. I love love love her. One thing that is amazing to me is that she smells just like my other babies. Seriously, what are the odds of that? Her breath, her neck, her head, all of it, when I smell her it is the same yummy scent Elle and Ava have. So amazing how Heavenly Father works in our favor. You know how much smells mean to me so it is amazing that she smells so good. She is so much like my other girls that it is almost like I have a biological daughter who just happens to be oriental. So amazing to me how the Lord works.

The time is going quickly, we only have 5 more days and then we get to be home and let our girls shower her with love. It will be such a happy reunion.

What a Difference Some Love and Attention Will Make

Her two fingers are ALWAYS in her mouth!! so cute

In visiting the foster home I felt at peace as I knew that Eve was cared for in the way that the foster mother knew her and that it was as good a circumstance as could be expected but there were obvious signs that all the love and attention she showered on Eve at that meeting was not the norm. Signs such as; Eve is 8 months old and has difficulty holding up her head and cannot sit up by herself. When I first got her she just slumped over in my arms as if she had no muscle tone to hold herself up at all. I have caught a few pictures of her sitting up but that is with help and the minute the picture is taken she tumbles over. She can put NO weight on her legs. If I try to stand her up on my lap her legs collapse in a fetal position, it is obvious she spent most of her time in a chair maybe similar to the one in the picture of the child in the foster home ( a couple of post back) and she was most likely propped up for most, if not all of the day. She has never seen a toy and can’t grab or hold one. She also has never eaten anything but a bottle. Food of any kind is absolutely foreign to her.

Getting stronger every day

The first 3 days Eve was quite stoic. She would give a smile here and there but it was obvious that she was not used to being talked to, giggled at, kissed on or constantly loved. From the first day she always looked intently into our eyes as if searching and asking, “who are you? Are you here to stay? Can I trust you?” Well each day we have seen drastic improvement. I am actually in shock at what has happened in just 4-5 days. We have put her on her tummy to build up back and neck muscles, when we hold her we straighten out her legs and have her work those muscles and we look in her eyes and talk to her endlessly. She gets so much love attention and care and I can see that she is just soaking it all in.

Well, she now can hold herself up when she is in my arms, her muscle tone has drastically improved and it is obvious. Two days ago it was like someone turned a light on to her soul. She just seemed to wake up to life and love and became herself. She is funny and silly and smiley and constantly coos and sticks her tongue out and makes funny sounds. She responds and plays little games and for the first time yesterday she began playing with toys, actually grabbing holding and playing with a toy. Yesterday, she rolled over for the first time (she is yet to repeat this feat but she did it twice so we know it is in her) .

It is hard to tell in words how night and day different we see in just 5 days but it is like her spirit said “Ok time to be yourself, trust and be happy”. As I have watched these warp speed improvements I can’t express how much joy I have. At times I am almost not sure I my physical body can take it all in. I am bursting with excitement as I can see directly how our love is causing her to blossom and open up. It is rewarding beyond belief. I feel such gratitude tonight!

Eve and Willa, these two were neighbors in foster care. We will make sure that they stay friends.

Willa and Eve back at the hotel

Angels Among Us

Long lines for medial checks

This morning I got up and read the news and felt discouraged. I just saw so much that deeply concerns me and I was in a small funk as I began the day but something in my day changed all that.

We are now in Guangzhou staying at the Swan Hotel. This hotel and island are famous because all adoptive families have to come here. The U.S. consulate is located here so this is the place to finalize all the paperwork and visas. We headed out this morning to have a medical check. Prior to leaving the country the children all have to be examined by 2 or 3 doctors to determine if they are healthy to travel or if there are any problems.

When we got to the clinic the place was packed. There were at least 40 adoptive families and their children there so I braced for a long day. As things proceeded I had the opportunity to talk to many of the parents and meet their children. It was a chance to brush shoulders with some of the best, most compassionate wonderful people I have ever met. I would say that at least 40% of the children there were special needs, some were severe. I watched these parents in absolute awe. To have a biological special needs child is a daunting task yet I was speechless at these parents who made this choice. Prior to adopting a special needs child from China you receive their picture and full medial history so you come with your eyes wide open as to what you will be dealing with. Here were people all around me who looked at these pictures of these sweet children with sever deformities, abnormalities and physical problems and said, “I choose you”. I was constantly trying to hide my tears as I watched them. The admiration and respect I hold for these people is beyond words. I knew that I was brushing shoulders with some of the most amazing people I will ever meet. As I said before, I believe that love is a choice, these parents made amazing beautiful choices that left me in awe.

We were in and out of the clinic very quickly as my cute little Eve with her pretty bow and little white sweater giving smiles and giggles was healthy and there was no need for further examination. We left parents who would be there a long time with sweet children who will have a lifetime of medical needs. These are the children they chose…..Today I know that angels walk among us.

All healthy and on our way back to the hotel!

Goodbye Nanchung

(Not sure why everything is under lined?! Didn't do it myself and I can't find why in HTML...oh well.)

The last day in Nanchung we went to a park and just had a nice relaxing day walking and visiting a Daioist temple

Along the way we saw this fisherman........can you see how he is struggling. We stayed for 20 min and watched him reel this huge fish in

It was huge and gave him a run for his money. He will make big money selling that at the market!

The entry way to Daoist temple

Notice anything funny about this statue in the temple????? We had a good laugh

This is Frank, the Hotel doorman who took us out to dinner. THis day he got off work at 11:30 am but stayed at the hotel until 3:00 just to see us off. When we left, he said that we will be forever friends! We really liked him.

Meeting the Foster Family

(Just a note: you may want to read the post before this one first if you haven't.)

On the way to visit the Foster family an overwhelming sadness came over me and I began to question the whole day. Everything felt out of sorts and wrong. I think at that point if someone had asked if we would just like to head back to Nanchung I would have said yes, I am glad they didn’t.

Here I am bewildered as the mother takes Eve from me and out of the van.

When we arrived in this small village we first went to the home of the Tate’s foster family. We knew that the two foster families lived very close to each other so we knew they were right there. At this point Eve had finally fallen asleep in my arms and I said to Chris “you go ahead and take some pictures, I will stay here and let her sleep”. He headed out and suddenly I could see out the window a little lady seeming to be in an absolute tizzy and looking everywhere in a panic. I suddenly sensed that this was Eve’s foster mother and she was desperately trying to find Eve. Through the translator Chris told her that Eve was sleeping in the van and without any hesitation she marched right over to the van taking loudly and very fast as if she was upset and opened the door came right up to me, grabbed Eve out of my arms, woke her up and took her out. I stumbled out behind her in a daze as this all happened so fast. By the time I got to her she was surrounded by 5 or 6 of the neighbor women all kissing on and adoring Eve. I swear her foster mother kissed Eve’s cheeks a million times.

One of the many kisses

As I watched this scene unfold I felt so happy that I had come. The orphanage seemed so cold and stark and here at least there was love. It made me so grateful that Eve had been one of the lucky ones to go to foster care.

All of us Together

This mother never let me hold Eve again the whole time we were there. She kissed and kissed her cheek and showed her off to everyone as if she was proud and wanted to show everyone that Eve was well dressed and had a good family. The home was small and made of only concrete with no heat.

The bed that Eve slept in

I can now see why these babies are always so bundled up. These homes are freezing and the only way to stay warm is to put on layer after layer of clothing. The foster mother showed me that she had 3 other babies that she was taking care of. I went in and looked at each of them and they were all bundled up. I touched each of their cheeks (the only skin exposed) and knew that in the next few weeks or months mothers like me would come and give them a new safe and loving home.

One of the children she is also caring for.....

I am sure her forever mom and day will be coming soon

As I left the foster mother I thanked her for taking care of my daughter for 8 months and gave her a gift. The orphanage director told her to give Eve to me, she did reluctantly. Then a minute or two later she grabbed Eve back out of my arms and kissed her some more. The orphanage director came back and gave her a little scolding and then looked at me and motioned for me to take Eve back. It was a little battle but I understood, I can’t imagine caring for Eve for 8 months and then having to just give her up.

Eve is loved.

When she took her back and I had to almost wrestle her away.

Oh I understand her heart. I could never giver her up and I have only known her 3 days.

A Visit to the Orphanage

Looking our the window as we are taking the long drive to the orphanage

From the beginning I knew that I wanted to do everything I could to visit the places that Eve had spent the first 8 months of her life. Yesterday we did just that and it was the most difficult day here, yet I am so glad I made the choice to go. I know more about Eve and her reactions and behavior because of it.

Up until this point our guide had mentioned that the orphanage was 2 hours away. When we got in the van to go she let us know that in reality it was 3 ½ hours away. Chris looked at me with the “what have we gotten ourselves into” look. I wasn’t even sure I had packed enough formula and diapers for that long of a journey. That meant 7 hours in the car. It was going to be a long day. On top of that it was a dark, rainy and cold. Chris whispered, “are you sure you want to do this?” I did and felt it would always bother me that I had the chance to know where she had been and didn’t take it. So off we went.

We left the city and headed out into the countryside of China passing rice field, after rice field and many small villages. I was happy knowing that being in Nanchung, and then taking this journey into these small villages, we were getting the chance to go where tourists rarely went, and I loved that! Even in the city of Nanchung it was obvious that these people were not accustomed to seeing Americans.

The view on the way to the orphanage....oh these poor pigs are squished in....where is PETA when we need them. ha ha

One of the hotel staff, a 23yr old door man who could speak broken English, asked if he could take Chris and Eve and I out to dinner (this was the day that we received Eve). It was such a kind and generous offer we couldn’t refuse so we went with him and his girlfriend to a wonderful dinner. While there I asked him how many Americans he sees at the hotel. He said, “You are the first”.

The drive was long and interesting and much more raw than I expected. About halfway through we stopped for a bathroom break at a gas station and the bathroom was so dirty and smelled so bad it took squatter hole to a whole new level. That is how it was the whole day so, if you can believe it, I just held it the whole day. Yup from the time we left until returning at 7pm I didn’t go to the bathroom I waited until I got back to the hotel. I just couldn’t do it!

The orphanage where Eve spent the first month of her life was darker, dirtier, and sadder than I had expected. It could have also been the dreary day but it just felt so sad to me. The building was decent but so quiet and hollow. We asked the orphanage director how many children were currently there and he said 40. I was struck by the silence, where were these 40 children and why could I not hear a sound? As we arrived they set of fireworks to welcome us, it was very very loud and I thought oh my goodness they have just scared all the children who live here to death. We heard nothing, not one cry. They took us on , what I felt was, a sanitized tour of the building ending up in a room with fruit baskets for us to eat. The other family on our group sneaked into a room that they didn’t take us to where the babies were it was walls lined with cribs with little babies in side but absolute silence. Not a cry or whimper.

The Gate Where Eve Was Left

Front Door to the Orphanage

We were then told that to visit the foster families it would be an additional 30 min each way drive, wow this was going to be a long day but we could do it. They took us to have lunch first and at this point I will just say that not only did I not use the restroom all day, I also didn’t eat. I am an adventurous girl and up until now have tried most foods here. I do not want to offend or look arrogant so I will never totally turn something down, I will try to eat what I can and be gracious but this time I just couldn’t.

Chris is eating...rice.

Lunch!! This actually make it look better than it was.

We sat down and the first dish was served, it was a murky broth with pigs feet and other strange appendages, there was hair still on the skin and gristle and bone and fat and I couldn’t see anything that looked like meat. Next dish, some type of catfish partially ground up with the head and whiskers lying there just looking at me. Then a plate with hundreds of minature fish (head and tail on) that looked like they had been sautéed with lots of spices. At that point Eve started to cry, Oh thank heaven!!

Sorry, can't eat I've gotta take care of my baby

I threw Chris under the bus and left the room to take care of her. He was left to maneuver through the meal alone. I never went back and just excused myself as needing to take care of my fussy, tired baby. Poor Chris! Eve has been so good this was the only time since we got her that she has fussed for an extended period of time and I think the Lord blessed her to do so for my sake!

Later Chris told me that he just ate a little rice and just pretended to try a few things without really eating anything at all! Now it was off to meet the foster family!

All About Eve

I finally have a minute to sit down and write some of my feelings. I will begin with how I feel about Eve.

I have to say that as we embarked on this journey to China I felt such strong feelings of love and attachment to her but all I had was a picture so I did wonder how I was going to feel when she was finally put in my arms. It didn’t worry me too much because I know that love is not a feeling, it is a choice and I knew my choice. Yet I wondered what it would all feel like and how my emotions would be. The night before we were to get her I had very strong dreams and impressions that were significant to me. So I awoke that morning feeling tender with tears close to the surface. The babies were being brought to the hotel at 11:00am so we started the day and went to breakfast. When we got to the hotel restaurant I walked in and there eating breakfast were 5 or 6 families who had gotten their children the day before. As I watched each of these new mothers and fathers I could hardly eat, I was transfixed watching them knowing that in only a few hours I would be like them. I kept getting teary eyed, trying to hold it all back.

At 10:00 am we were to meet our guide in the hotel lobby to go over paper work and a few final details. Some things needed to be photocopied so Chris headed to the front desk to get them copied. Our guide was asking us if, when the time came, we wanted to go to our rooms and have them bring the babies up to us or just wait and meet them in the lobby. All of a sudden we looked up and waking in the front door I saw two women carrying babies. I panicked……no!! it was only 10:25 and Chris wasn’t here, he was still off making copies. It was like going into labor and realizing your husband wasn’t going to make it in time.

My eyes were frantically scanning the lobby for him when suddenly he casually came around the corner and I did everything I could to communicate to him to get over here fast!! It was a whirlwind moment as he just barely arrived in time, but he made it!

The women didn’t give us the babies right away; they held them and just let us talk and interact for a few minutes. Eve seemed bewildered and a little upset. After a few minutes I took Eve from her and Eve began to cry, oh no! I could feel immediately that her diaper was full. Then the lady who had been holding her said, through the translator, that Eve was very hungry and hadn’t eaten for 3-4 hours. They had nothing with them, no bottle or anything so I just said a quick good by and headed straight up to the room to take care of her. As we got on the elevator Eve urinated again and her diaper was so full at this point that it all came out on me!! It went down my shirt and pants and made a nice big puddle on the elevator floor. We got up to the room and got her quickly changed and got a bottle to feed her. So as you can see this introduction was a little chaotic. . I will say this that Eve was nicely clothed in a new outfit (still had a sticker on it) she smelled very good and had obviously been bathed that morning, she was well taken care of as she was chubby, no diaper rash, and looked very healthy.

That first feeding was hard because I didn’t have the bottle she had been used to and the only thing that I had was American formula, again something so new. We had been told that they usually bring some of the formula that the babies had been using so that we could wean them slowly onto the new formula but they didn’t. My heart went out to Eve trying to absorb all these new things at once. She didn’t want to take the bottle at first but was so hungry she finally acquiesced.

Within 30 minutes everything had calmed down, she was in fresh new pajamas, fed and being loved and she seemed so happy. We then got on skype and shared the moment with our two oldest daughters, my sister and my niece. Eve was absolutely happy and would rest her head on my shoulder. She was frightened for sure but seemed to be taking to all the love and physical attention.

Now to how I feel; there is absolutely no difference in how I feel for her than I did with each of my four daughters. I really didn’t expect it to be this strong. She is mine, my spirit knows it and I know her spirit knows it. She just melts into us and looks intently into our eyes. I watched my husband closely because he was a VERY doting father with each of our babies, more than I imagine most husbands would be. With our other 4 girls he would get mad if I held them too much and tell me I was hogging them, he was deeply concerned about being there for every milestone, bath time, and wanted to be the one to feed and care for them. He is not one whit different with her. He is possessive and attentive and full of so much love for her. I know that there is absolutely no difference for us in our feelings for Eve than our others. I honestly didn’t know this would happen.

He and I talked about it last night and Chris said to me. I really thought that I would feel different, I was prepared to grow in love with her but it was instantaneous. What a blessing. Now that we have had her for almost 3 days we can see that she is also in heaven with all this attention and kissing. Every time we kiss her (which is all the time) she smiles from ear to ear. She seems so at peace and happy with us. It has not been a hard transition at all, it has been just the opposite….complete love and joy!

I think she feels the same way that we do.

She Is Here

Eve is here. I'm speechless. What more can I say. Here are our first minutes with her. She was tired and hungry. She is Wonderful!!

We have now had 2 days with Eve and I think we know her pretty well and we just can't believe how perfect she is. She is soooooo good. She never cries unless she needs to burp or needs to eat but even then she will just let out a little yell to let us know. Yesterday afternoon she took a 3 hour nap and would have gone longer but we had to be somewhere and had to wake her up and she was not easy to wake up, she is a sleeper.

We took her out yesterday evening with us as one of the hotel staff asked if he and his girlfriend could take us out to dinner, we went to a restaurant that is the China version of "The Melting Pot". It was a table with a wok type heated pan in the middle filled with veggies and hot boiling broth. Then they bring out platters of meats and veggies to dip in and cook in the hot broth. It was so good but we wondered how Eve would do on her first day with us going out on this adventure. She was wonderful, she smiled at all the waiters and was so cute. After the night out we came back to the hotel and put her to bed at about 10pm. I braced myself to be woken up a few times in the night but she slept until 7am. At 7 I heard some sweet little cooing from the crib and when I went over to greet her she was all smiles. I again expected her to wake up in a new place and be upset or at least get upset when she saw a new face greeting her this first night away from her foster home but she just giggled and smiled and was so dear. I think she knows we are hers and she is ours.

We went to the government offices this morning and went through tons of paperwork, interviews and then got our official document stating that the adoption is final.....it's official, she is ours.

Chris and I have had such a blissful trip. We feel so blessed, especially as we walked by the hotel room of the other family who came with us and heard constant crying coming from their room all day. Their little girl had a hard day and night but today is doing much better.

Again, we can't thank you all enough for your love and prayers and can't wait to bring our new angel home.