Tennis Lesson!

WARNING: Long post that probably only family will want to read! This is more of a journal entry of motherly thoughts.

She and I just before she gave her speech.

On Tues night Chloe gave a speech for Honor Society. She did the tribute to the teachers and did such a great job. It was the perfect mix of sentimental, recognition and humor. She looked beautiful.

Wed night Elle and I went to the "Great to be 8" event. Wow this year she will be baptized. It was mostly fun just to be with her and have one on one time!!


Thursday, Chloe was in a doubles tennis tournament. I spent the whole day watching her play.
She did incredible!! She served 7 aces in the championship game and went on to take first place. I have to take a minute here and talk about why I was so proud of her. I was absolutely bursting with pride yesterday and most would think it was because she won but that is not why. I was proud of her for something I feel is so much more important than a win. I am proud that every time this girl bumps up against adversity she will exert every imaginable resource she can muster to succeed.
Those of you who know us know that Chloe has always been a tennis player. She and Olivia started competing at 7 and 9yrs respectively, and both went on be be ranked in the top 5 in a 5 state region. For 3 years it absorbed our life but 2 years ago they both came to us and said "no more". They had lost their love for it and felt the pressure was too much. Chris and I agreed. It was hard to give it up because I saw so much ability in them but we knew their happiness and peace of mind was more important. So we moved on and they focused on various other activities. Neither of them have even picked up a racket for 2 years. So, when school tennis tryouts came along this year I was surprised that Chloe signed up. She made the competition team which brought us to yesterdays tournament, the first of the year.

Remember she hasn't played for 2 years so I knew this was going to be rough. I arrived a few min late for the first game and felt sick immediately......she was playing, well lets just say, not so good. Chris was out of town and I texted him...."Oh it is bad, very bad!". As the game went on I could see her working things out in her mind. She is so positive and didn't let her initial struggles get her down. by then end of the game she was playing decent and she and her partner went on to win. It wasn't too a tough win, the other team was just mediocre, she was happy.
They began warm ups for the next match. Again I texted her Dad...."Ok, This one is going to be a blood bath". The next match was against a team that was significantly better than the first team and in the warm-up the balls were coming hard and low. I braced for a tough loss. The first set was lost 6-1. At this point, knowing Chloe, I knew she was in no way giving in to defeat but mental toughness and skill set are two different things. She never got upset or seemed rattled, she just seemed to be calmly trying to rectify the things she saw she was having difficulty with. Bit by bit I saw her working at correcting her mistakes. All of a sudden she just seemed to become so focused and began retuning everything they gave her with as much force as they were dishing out. Suddenly her serve became ruthless and she was back in the game. The other team seemed a little shell shocked as well as their coach. They were thinking this was going to be an easy win but suddenly the whole game changed. Her team went on to win the second set 6-2....then on to win the match in a tie breaker. Chloe was elated.
She then told me who they were going to have to play in the championship match.....Oh no. It was the number one seeded team from the school notorious for their amazing tennis program. These girls play 5 days a week 2-3 hours all year. I just said "Chloe, dig deep and do your best". Well, she dug deep alright.....again they lost the first set but went on to win the second and then took the win in a tie breaker with Chloe serving 7 aces in that match alone.
Afterward I just said to her "Chloe, had you just gone out and won in straight sets, it would have been great, but you showed a tenacity, determination, and fortitude that says more about you as a person than an easy win would ever tell."

This impacted me especially right now because I have been thinking about the world we live in and what my kids are facing and going through. It is tough....really tough for teenagers. The pressures and what has become acceptable is changing so fast but our family values are not. There are some difficult choices that Chloe has had to make lately but she is the kind of girl who, when down, will dig deep and come out better.

I am reading a book called "The Survivors Club". I am loving it and have been so affected by the premise. Who are survivors? Who, when everything seems lost will still come back to succeed? Who are the people who live when death is near and all the odds are against them? The book goes through the qualities and characteristics of a survivor and what makes them different. I feel as though our world is changing fast and I want to raise my children to be survivors. I want them to be able to face adversity and maneuver through it with grace. I want them to know the source of their strength and rely on their Father in Heaven. I want them to know that it doesn't matter how lost the battle seems you can always come back to win the war.

So, her tennis win was about being proud and grateful that I glimpsed that she has some of these qualities. She is the kind of person who doesn't get down and give up.


Tonight was one of her best friend's birthday party. She didn't go because the party included going to a movie that, although only PG-13, doesn't in any way reflect her values. She felt all the things teenage girls feel, worried, sad to be left out, a little embarrassed to tell her friends that she is choosing not to go and facing the questions as to why. Her moral convictions have made her different among her friends already. As she made the phone call to tell her friend of her choice I listened in amazement. She didn't falter, she wasn't apologetic for her choice, she was kind and non judgemental. I am so very proud of the wise choices she is making and her fortitude when things are tough......point.....set.....match!